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Even Solitary Play Has Value

3/28/2023

Solitary (Independent) play is as important as learning to play with others. It helps children develop a stronger sense of independence. Children comfortable with solitary play feel more capable of tackling tasks independently and figuring out how they fit in. Children playing alone learn about people interacting by observing group interactions from afar. Of course, we are not suggesting that children only play alone. Playing with others is essential.

However, solitary play allows children to experiment with their own creativity and ideas. When alone, and even bored, children's brains take up the challenge. They find new and exciting ways to stimulate themselves. Albert Einstein said, “the monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulate the creative mind.”

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More About Children Playing

3/27/2023

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With each additional insight about children playing you may wonder why I am writing so many insights about this topic. I do not want you to feel guilty if children are spending a lot of time playing. I want you to realize that play, as you will read in the coming insights is constructive and valuable.

When adults feel overwhelmed, we retreat into activities that soothe us. We exercise, go for a walk, weed the garden or play a board game. These activities are a way of bringing play back into our lives.

Children are the same, although they need a lot more playtime than adults. Frequent daily play can help reduce anxiety, stress and irritability. It can boost joy and self-esteem. Children generally have little power or say over their daily activities. This is even more true during war, displacement, and chaos. But in the world of play, they have the opportunity to set the rules and be the ones with the power. For a short period of time, they feel that life is under control.

Play is as much a part of healthy development as eating vegetables, reading books together, and getting a good night’s sleep. Through play, children learn how to live in a way they can understand. They learn how to work in groups, share, negotiate, solve conflicts and speak up for themselves. All these skills are important in learning how to live post-trauma or mid-trauma.

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Listen to your children playing

3/24/2023

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Give them every possible opportunity to play. Younger children often express their feelings through play rather than with words or conversation; it helps them work out the pain they have experienced.

Children don’t need fancy toys to play with. They need time, space and freedom to explore the ideas that interest them. Play builds imagination and creativity which are essential to problem-solving in life. During play, children learn how to navigate life and act out different solutions. This boosts their confidence.

Parents and adults can enter into their play when appropriate and ask them what they are playing and how they feel about it. This may help children talk about their fears and help adults identify concerns and suggest a solution. Adults observing play can help children better understand emotions by naming them. For example,

It sounds like you are nervous or fearful about ________________”.
“It sounds like you are fearful about Daddy leaving tomorrow”.
“You sounded so happy when you ___________________”
“When you play with those toys it sounds like ___________________”.

Listening and asking questions shows children that adults care. It tells them that their feelings and experiences are valid. This opens the door to talking about traumatic events and fears.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. 1 John 4:18

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The Importance of Children Helping

3/17/2023

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Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God. Hebrews 13:16

In times of stress and trauma, it is good to have things that take our minds off the past trauma and present anxiety. It is good to feel needed. This is also true for children. Therefore, we should give them any tasks that they are capable of doing. Even if monotonous and very routine; even if we could do it, and maybe do it better.

It is important that we do not forget to thank them and praise them when they are successful. We should let them know that they are making a valuable contribution. If they remember to do something without telling, praise them for remembering.

Successful completion of a task will help counteract feelings of things being out of control. It will give a sense of security and being in control. It also teaches them to live a life of worship since as today’s verse tells us, doing good and sharing is a sacrifice that is pleasing to God.

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Helpful Routines

3/14/2023

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Here are some routines that release the supernatural power of God. Each day take the time. or multiples times in the day to:
1) talk together
   2) pray together about what is happening
   3) repeat encouraging or comforting Bible passages
   4) sing a song that contains a biblical truth
   5) thank your child when they do some positive.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

If you know of a song or special Bible passages that help children deal with trauma, share it in the comments. That way others can benefit.

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SWIRLS OF NURTURE

Even Solitary Play Has Value

More About Children Playing

Listen to your children playing

The Importance of Children Helping

Helpful Routines

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